New Caledonia

Friday 5/Saturday 6 July

3am flights are just no good, but if you’ve got to do them the airport at Rarotonga isn’t the worst place to be.  There’s a little bar where you can sit and sip a beer while a guy with a ukulele sings you a farewell song.  We’re flying to New Caledonia via Auckland.  It takes about 4.5 hours to reach Auckland but along the way we cross the date line, jumping forward suddenly to Saturday morning.  We have just enough time to grab some breakfast before getting the 2.5 hour flight to Noumea in New Caledonia.

After all the small, tropical islands it’s quite a shock to the system to be on an actual, significant land mass.  This is an island that you can’t drive all the way round in a day – it takes 50 minutes just to get from the airport into town.  It’s still too early to check–in to our hotel, but we dump our bags and head out for a walk.  We’re staying in Anse Vata – a touristy suburb on a beautiful, sweeping bay. 

It is, of course, winter here and while it isn’t tropically hot it’s lovely and warm in the sunshine.

We stop at a seafront café for some lunch and then get ourselves checked-in.  By the time we’ve managed to unpack and drag ourselves out for some groceries the afternoon has disappeared.

We find a bar nearby that serves us local beers with huge bowls of peanuts and then head next door for shockingly expensive pizzas. 

Sunday 7 July

After another bout of jetlag and little sleep we’re operating at a snail’s pace today. 

Noumea is another place with weird alcohol sales laws.  You can’t buy booze on Wednesday, Friday, Saturday or Sunday afternoons – but you can buy on Sunday mornings.  We start the day with another trip to the supermarket to get some beers and the makings of dinner – at last night’s prices we won’t be doing too much eating out.

We’re not finding it quite warm enough to hang out on the beach, but we do take a stroll round to the next bay, Baie des Citrons.  It’s another lovely crescent of sand backed by cafes and restaurants. 

Sunday afternoon is ice-cream time and we find a boutique-y ice-cream shop that makes the most beautiful flower cones.  It would be a shame to eat them if they didn’t taste so good.

The evening is spent relaxing on our balcony with free wifi and views of the sunset over the skyline.

Monday 8 July

We wake up to rain this morning so we’re a little slow getting out and about to do anything.  Once the morning clears up we decide to walk into the city centre.  It’s takes about an hour to walk in, but it’s a nice enough walk along the city’s bays and marinas.  Apart from the beautiful waterfront views, the town itself feels rather like most cities.  We could be in France rather than the South Pacific and our horrifically bad basic French is getting a lot of practice.

We’re trying to find a sandwich shop for lunch when Nick spots a sign for a stone grill.  He hasn’t had one of these since New Zealand 2 years ago.  Basically, a big chunk of meat of your choice is served to you on a sizzling hot stone and you get to cook it yourself.  It’s too good to walk past, so we treat ourselves.

A few afternoon rain showers slow down our walk back to the hotel and by the time we get in the afternoon has almost gone.  There’s just enough time to have a go at torturing myself in the fitness room downstairs.

Janet adds: this is the first place we’ve been in a while where the main industry isn’t tourism.  We actually have to work at being tourists a little bit.

Tuesday 9 July

It’s sunnier again today, but we’ve been spoilt by tropical weather and are still not brave enough to hit the beach.  At the end of our bay is a hill that’s just begging to be climbed and so we do.  The views from the top are glorious, with sweeping bays and islets in most directions.  From up here it really is a beautiful city.

We also spot a nearby beach that seems to be sheltered from the ever-present wind that turns Anse Vata into a windsurfer’s paradise.  After lunch we walk over there and find a calm spot of sunshine to warm our bones in.  I’m even brave enough for a paddle, but wuss out of anything more.

Wednesday 10 July

We’ve decided to hire a car for a couple of days so that we can explore a little further afield and maybe do some hiking.  We head out of the city towards the Parc Provincial de la Riviere Bleue.  It takes about an hour to get there but when we arrive we find it inexplicably shut.  There goes that idea.  Since we’re out here anyway we decide to do a lazy loop of the southern end of the island.  Nearby we find the picturesque Madeleine falls and stop for a quick look-see.

We’re driving across the narrow end of the island heading for the opposite coast.  The road is steadily climbing through the hills and mountains that run up the middle.  We’re getting deep into mining country and the scenery is a bit like Western Australia: all stubby green plants and blood red earth.  The big difference is that it’s wet here.

We find a lovely lookout spot to eat our sandwiches

and then push on.  As we reach the other coast and start heading round the point the roads deteriorate but the vegetation gets more lush and tropical.  Mining has scarred the hills.  Red mud and dust coats everything and the blue lagoon has been turned to blood by the run-off.  Old mining ruins jut out of the vegetation like Mayan ruins. 

It’s strangely beautiful but also a little sad to think what this may have looked like in a pristine state.  Still, mining is what puts food on most New Caledonians tables, so it’s not for me to criticize.

We stop at Prony to stretch our legs and take a walk through the coastal forest to an old convict settlement. 

The afternoon is getting on and there’s still a long drive back to the city.  The roads are still getting worse with potholes, washed out areas and numerous water crossings.  Luckily we’re well prepared in our bright purple Peugeot 106 – a squeaky, creaky city car with zero clearance.  Still, it mans up to the abuse and looks pretty cute too.

We’re driving through the middle of nowhere when suddenly, perched in the hills, a huge mine looms like a nightmare fantasy city.  It’s a bizarre and creepy sight and I’m happy to rush past.  Luckily the roads improve from here and we get back into town just as dusk is falling.

Thursday 11 July

We have our car again today, but this time we’re smart enough to check in with tourist information to see if the Parc Provincial de la Riviere Bleue is open before we set off.  It’s a good thing we do, because it’s shut again.

We’re a bit out of ideas, but we decide to head north as we haven’t been that way yet.  There are a couple of day hikes that look promising in this direction.  It’s a fairly scenic drive but for most of the way we’re blasting up a motorway.  It means the roads are good, but the driving is some of the most horrific we’ve seen.

After spending so much time on smaller islands we’re not much good at judging time and distances.  Couple this with some misinformation and a spate of road works and the morning ends with us still sat in the car.  We’re the better part of an hour away from our intended hike and, of course, we’ve still got to get back again.  We decide to give up and head a little way inland where we find a scenic little spot on the riverbank to have lunch. 

A short walk through the surrounding forest leads us to some cascades.  It’s time to turn around and make our way back.  At least we’ve stretched our legs and seen a bit more of the island.

Friday 12 July

It’s a cooler, windier day today and as we’re not inclined to don our snorkels and see New Caledonia’s lagoon up close, we do the next best thing: visit the aquarium. It’s a lovely aquarium full of captivating displays.  I’m happy to spend a couple of hours making friends with the ‘inmates’.

When we emerge we continue walking round and into town.  We’re planning to visit the museum, but as it’s closed for lunch we take that as our cue to get lunch too.  The museum, when we get to it, is packed with art and artifacts from New Caledonia and the rest of the Pacific.

Once we’ve absorbed as much information as we can we start our walk back, detouring briefly to our new favourite ice-cream shop.

Saturday 13 July

The weather isn’t great today but we’ve done pretty much all we wanted to do here, so we’re more than happy to have a relaxed day making the most of our unlimited free wifi.  We take a walk out in the morning to stretch our legs and in the afternoon the sun comes out, so we take another long walk along the seafront. 

In the evening we get the suitcases packed up and hit the sack – we’ve got an early start tomorrow.